Never Forget

10 years ago today I was a fairly new Mom. Noah was 7 months old and we spent our days just playing, eating, sleeping, playing some more. (If only I knew then what I know now, I would've realized how blissfully easy those days were.) Anyway, I was watching Good Morning America when the planes hit the World Trade Centers. I just sat in shock. I remember holding him tighter and just wondering what his little life would hold. I knew his life would be different because of these events.

The next day, we were starting my first women's Bible study at our church. I remember walking out to the car with him and just looking up at the sky. It was still so fresh in my mind. I worried if more planes would strike. We were really close to Dallas. How would this affect us? When we got to church, all of the women met together and we just prayed for the victims, their families, the rescuers, and our country. It was a powerful time. We were all still so scared of the unknown, but had peace knowing that our Sovereign God was in control of it all.

As I made this cake, I was explaining to Noah why I was making it. We had never discussed September 11th with him before. It blew his little mind that men would give up their lives to kill others. Our little ones can't comprehend the evil of our world. In some ways, I felt like I was robbing him of some of his innocence. But, I wanted him to know. I wanted him to hear it from us and not from the media or a friend.

We will never forget.

God's Word

Today was our first day at Community Bible Study. It was SO SO good to be back with a group of women studying God's Word. When we lived in McKinney/Melissa, I was in a women's Bible study and for the past year I haven't done one. The great thing about this one is that the boys get to come with me. They are not just in "baby-sitting" either. They have a curriculum that goes right along with mine (studying the book of Daniel right now) and they have homework, too. So, it teaches them to have a quiet time and build a relationship with the Lord. It will be so good for all of us. Plus, lots of their homeschool buddies are there, too, which made the new experience less frightening. Jonah still growled at his teacher when we got there, but he told me later that he was "just nervous".

This morning, I finished reading the Bible. It took me 90 days. I did the Bible in 90 Days plan. A friend had told me about it and I just felt God calling me to do that. I have read a lot of the Bible in my journey with the Lord, but I had never read it cover to cover. It was more of a blessing than I can type in one blog post. I really want to encourage you to do it. This schedule (there's no program to buy) just breaks the Bible down into small chunks to read every day. It took me about an hour every day. I am so thankful that Community Bible Study started on the day I finished this, or I might be tempted to sleep in tomorrow. : ) Seriously, though, God's Word is "living and active, sharper than any double-edged sword". I am beyond thankful that anytime I open the Book, he uses words that were written thousands of years ago and helps me apply them to my life right now. Truly amazing!

Wordless Wednesday

One Step Closer

Today we are one (BIG!) step closer to bringing our baby girl home. Yesterday and today was our home study. A social worker from Lutheran Social Services came and spent about 5 hours total with our family. I think she knows us VERY well now. : ) She interviewed each of us separately, which was the part we were most nervous about. What would the boys say? What would they make up? They did absolutely great. I am so proud of them. Apparently, Luke was in an earthquake that we never knew about, but that was the only shocking news.
The main question she had to ask each of them, besides making sure they understood what's going on, was how they would handle it if a friend asked about their sister with black skin. Their responses just filled my heart with joy!
Noah: "I will tell them that she's my adopted sister and that she was in an orphanage. She didn't have any parents to take care of her or food to eat, so we brought her to live with our family."

Luke: "I will say, 'You silly! God made everyone in the whole world. Do you think He made everybody with PEACH skin? No WAY! He made people with all different colors on their skin and my sister has brown skin.'"

Jonah: "WELLLLL (all of his answers started this way), she will DEFINITELY not look like me. She will have brown skin, brown hair, and brown eyes.....annnnnd I'm NOT a girl!"

Just hearing their little hearts brought me such joy. Luke knows about the earthquake in Haiti, so I'm sure that's how the idea got planted in his mind. He told her all about the time he was outside and the ground started shaking. He does have a big imagination!

I had to eavesdrop on Noah and Luke's interviews because they wanted to do it by themselves. Of course, I couldn't stand that. As I stood in the other room listening to them talk, my heart was overflowing with thankfulness. It all felt so surreal. This has been such a lonnnnng journey and the home study is such a big step. Just hearing my little darlin's talking about their baby sister whom they already love with their whole hearts, made my heart so full. God has brought us a LONG way in just a year and I have a feeling that at this time next year, we will be saying the same thing. :)

Everyone is asking (including the boys who ask every day) how much longer. Only God knows the answer to that question. We still have quite a few documents to gather for our dossier. After all the gathering, each document has to be notarized (easy---notary right here in Mt. Vernon), then authenticated by the Secretary of State (through the mail, lots of red tape), then certified by the Haitian Consulate in Chicago (mail, again, more red tape). After each document has been through those 3 steps, that is our "dossier" (French for big, honkin' stack of paperwork). That's what gets sent to Haiti. 3-6 months after that gets to Haiti, we should be given our referral. That's when we will be matched with our baby girl and get her first pictures. Even after that, it could be another 6-12 months.
Like I said, only God knows. I heard a great quote by Louis Giglio (pastor of Passion Church) the other day. He said, "When Jesus is in the equation, there is always the possibility of a miracle."
That's what I believe! All of the red tape and all of the waiting might be much slower or must faster than we expect. We are going to wait patiently and trust His timing. He already knows our Gracie.

"By adopting a child and helping them reach their potential, they help us reach ours. An adopted child is not an unwanted child; to the contrary, they are a child who was searched for, prayed for, cried for, begged for; received by arms that ached, making empty hearts full. Love is meant to be shared"
- Author Unknown

I stole this from my friend Kim's blog. SO true and so good. I have those aching arms right now.

How YOU can help

GLA (the orphanage we are adopting from) is in a fundraising contest right now. You can help my voting on this website with EACH email address you use. You can vote 3 times (I think) with each address. If GLA wins the most votes, they get a huge grant.
Thanks for taking the time!

Can you help God's Littlest Angels win the Giving of Life campaign and win $50,000 that will pay for our formula costs for a year by doing three things:

1. Check back to http://givingoflife.com/browse/gods_littlest_angels_haitian_baby_ministry/ and see if it will let you vote again.
2. Go to http://givingoflife.com/register/ and register all of your e-mail addresses - one at a time. You'll then get a confirmation e-mail so that they know you sent it. You have to click on the link in that e-mail. Each e-mail address will give you 2 more votes.
3. Now go to your e-mail address book and pick 5 of your best friends and ask them to spend 10 minutes and register all of their e-mail addresses and vote for us.

If everyone who reads this registers one more e-mail address and get three friends to vote and register their "second" e-mail address, we'll vault from 4th place way up to a spot that will make a significant difference to the kids at GLA.

Remember, this isn't about us. This isn't about who's the most popular.

This is about feeding our babies.

Families

Our social services agency (the agency conducting our home study) sent this article out today. I thought it was very well written. I have no doubt that we will encounter issues/dumb people when we add a child to our family with brown skin. I do not have blinders on. It won't be butterflies and roses all of the time. But, God is faithful and He has called us to this.
I know a family who has adopted trans-racially. They have a hispanic child, a biracial (hispanic/black) child, and a black child. The things strangers have said to them are quite amazing. I am prepared for anything!

Thankful

I am so thankful to be home with my babies. Yesterday was the first day of school for most districts in Texas. So, today's paper was full of "back to school" pictures. One picture really got me. It was a mom tearfully hugging her kindergartener before she left him for the day. This year Jonah is in kindergarten. I really don't think I could've left him. It would've been seriously difficult for me. Noah and Luke both went to kindergarten, but it was a UMS school and I knew we'd be home together more. Leaving Jonah all day, every day, 5 days week would be pretty much impossible for me. He's my BABY. I know the tough days are coming. (I'm writing this partly for myself to reread in the dead of winter when we're climbing the walls!) Today I am thankful to be right where I belong---at home with my boys.

Won't You Be My Love?

Some friends at church recently adopted two teenage boys from China. In church on Sunday, they were sharing how God is working on one of the boy's hearts and drawing him to Himself. It made me think of this song. The first time I heard it, it took my breath away.
The second verse is the most meaningful to me:

"a helpless little girl
with no family of her own
she is not to blame
for the journey she is on
her life is no mistake
would you lead her to My cross?"

This is why we're adopting. Yes, I want a little girl to hug and cuddle and play tea party with. Yes, I've always dreamed of having a daughter to dress up. But, THE MOST IMPORTANT reason why we want to bring our baby girl home is to lead her to His cross. Of course, that's our mission with our boys, too, and always has been since their birth. I am just in awe that God has chosen us to parent one (four!) of his children so that we can lead her to Him.

Broken Body Parts

So far, we have had no broken body parts amongst the McCraw monkeys. Until Tuesday. Noah and Luke were at the shop (after hours---a big NO-NO) and in the warehouse by themselves (another NO-NO). From the story we were told, they were putting water bottles in the freezer and when Noah opened the freezer door, it hit Luke in the mouth and chipped his tooth. You can't really see the detail in this picture, but it was the lower corner of his right front tooth. Easily visible. Not good.

Luke, our normally calm, easy-going middle child, came UNglued. He was NOT a happy camper. The chip wasn't deep enough to hit the nerve or cause any pain, but he was so angry at Noah for breaking his tooth. I made a quick call to our pediatric dentist in Allen and she agreed to see him Wednesday afternoon. We found the chipped piece on the ground and saved it.

The dentist, with the help of some laughing gas, did a great job repairing the tooth. It's really a work of art. You can't even tell it was broken. She said that since it's on his front tooth, it may chip one day when he bites into something crunchy, but that is pretty rare. When he's an adult, he could get veneers to cover the top 4 teeth.

People say we don't have drama because we have all boys. They need to spend a week at our house. :)
Blue shirt: broken tooth
Red shirt: repaired tooth

Like it? Love it?

So, what do you think about my new blog look? If you want your blog spruced up, click on my button on the right to go to Jen's website. She is raising money to bring home her adopted son. Thanks, Jen!

14 YEARS!

Look at us. Only kids. Never would I have guessed on that day that 14 years later, I'd be feeding 3 boys fishsticks and mac & cheese and trying to get them into bed so we could have our anniversary dinner. It's been a blissful 14 years and I wouldn't change a thing. God has blessed us with many "arrows in our quiver"....and more to come.

A New Year

We started school last Monday. It is a new year. It's our 2nd year of homeschooling and I feel like in some ways that we're starting completely over. Not that last year wasn't good. It's just that I learned so much and want to change so much. As a former public school teacher, I tried to put a "school" in our home. Not fun and not really possible. God has used different people and different books to change my outlook on how/what I want to teach our boys this year. It's a new year.

I went to a great homeschool conference and heard Sally Clarkson for the first time. A friend in co-op had told me about Sally's book, Educating the Whole-Hearted Child, but I had never read it. After hearing Sally speak, I bought her book and it has opened my eyes to so many things. (If you homeschool or are just thinking about it, this is a must-read!) God has just continued to whisper in my ear over and over that HE is the most important thing I should be teaching my boys. There is no amount of reading capability or math technique they can learn that will amount to a "hill of beans" compared to knowing Him. If they know Him, truly KNOW Him, all of the rest will fall into place.

Don't get me wrong....I'm not tossing out the textbooks and just doing nothing. It's just a more relaxed approach. Here are the 2 goals I feel like God wants me to concentrate on this year:
1. Relax
2. Let go of labels. (grade/age labels)

Teaching in the public school has almost been a hindrance for me because there were so many times I tried to teach my boys the same way I taught a 22-student classroom. It's what I know. It's what I went to college and studied all about. It's NOT homeschooling. I am very thankful for the training I had and the experience I had, but I need to let some of it go.

We started a new literature-based curriculum this year, Sonlight. One week into school and I can already tell you that we're going to love it. My boys are book-lovers anyway, so they are having a ball with all of the new books. I found Luke in his room reading an entire chapter book last week just because he couldn't wait for me to finish it.

It's going to be a great year.
In other news, our adoption of our baby girl is moving right along. I can't decide if I should start a whole new blog for that or do a better job of updating this one. Here's where we are so far:

1. Applied to GLA orphanage and was accepted
2. Contracted with an agency, All God's Children
3. Contracted with Lutheran Social Services for our home study
4. Made plans to begin our home addition next spring

Our home study is Aug. 28-29 and then we will only have paperwork and waiting left.
There are many days that my heart just aches to have her in our arms. God is faithful, though, and always quietly reassures me that He will have her here in His time.
We absolutely cannot wait and talk about her like she's already here! The boys are beyond excited!
P.S. The picture is the boys painting their own t-shirts. This was a fun art project we did on the first day. I wanted to do something special that they would remember. It was VERY interesting to see what they came up with.

Happy Birthday, Grandpa!

Grandpa turned 95 on July 18. Amazing! Everyone says, "I guess you hope you got his genes!" He is an amazing man. Bowls in several leagues. Exercises at the wellness center every day on the treadmill and bicycle. He's NEVER home because he has such an active social life. He comes to visit often, which we love. Not many little boys who have such a special relationship with their Great-Grandpa!
We had a party for him at the Mt. Pleasant Bowling Alley. It was a blast. So many of his bowling buddies were there and we all bowled. It will soon be time to start planning his 96th! Happy Birthday, Grandpa!

I love homeschooling!

I love homeschooling. Yes, it is January 13th and I am finally able to take a deep breath and say this. We started in September and there have been many tough days when I want to shave my head or run away, but the joys far outweigh the pains. I love that I can snuggle up with my boys on the couch in front of the fire and read all of the books we want. I love that we can just drop everything and go for a hike up the hill. I love that we don't have the rush, rush, rush of the morning routine. We wake up slowly (again, by the fire) and eat breakfast in a leisurely way. I love that they can run across the driveway and say hi to Daddy any time they want to. I love that I can go to appointments anytime I need to and they can continue school at home with our baby-sitter or do it later. I love the flexibility. I'm not, by nature, a flexible person. I am very Type A. Well, I used to be a lot more Type A than I am now. Once I became a Mom, God started whittling away at the Type A tendencies. It just doesn't make sense. Yes, we need order and routine in our house. But, I don't want to miss the joys because "it's too messy" or "not time" either. I love that we live so close to my brother and his family and we can keep my niece anytime. The boys don't have to wait til "after school" to see her.

I just plain love being with my kids. This time is so fleeting. We really will blink and wonder where it went. I already do that. How is my firstborn about to be 10? That's double digits! How is my baby already 5?

Homeschooling is the hardest thing I've EVER done. God has used it to humble me and bring me to my knees daily. But, I wouldn't trade it for the world. If you would've asked me 10 years ago if I would be one of "those" homeschooling moms, I would have given you and emphatic NO! God loves turning our "no's" and "nevers" into obedience to Him.

That is all we're doing. Obeying God in what He's called us to do for our family. The rewards have been simply amazing.

Here's reason #289 why we homeschool. What you can't see is that Jonah's only wearing his Toy Story underwear and a shirt. You can't do M&M math in your underwear in public school!

God is good and I love my life.

SNOW!!!

Today was the first snow since we moved here. Needless to say, the boys were itching to get outside as soon as rest time was over. We went to church, had lunch, and our Sunday afternoon naps before we bundled them up. I think the pictures say a thousand words. It truly is a winter wonderland here. (You can click on the photo for a larger view.)

A few more!

There are so many gorgeous shots of our little piece of country heaven. Robby's favorite is the one looking down at our cozy house from the top of the hill.

Really? July 15?

I'm not sure how this happened. I really did vow to do better with my blog. I can't believe July 15 was the last post. Yes, we moved to Mt. Vernon to slow down the pace of our lives, but there is still so much to do. Just different things.

Today was absolutely wonderful. My Mommy heart is full of joy and peace. It was the first true day of fall weather this year. We did school this morning, but by lunchtime I was itchin' to get outside. We decided to forgo treadmill time and get our exercise outside. The perimeter of our property measures 2 miles. So, we grabbed a bag to collect nature and set off on a great adventure. The boys LOVED it. We collected trash along the road to throw away. They had so much fun spotting pieces of nature and throwing them in our bag. Our favorite find was a group of 5 pinecones----one for each member of our family----on a stick. They are all stuck together and we named them after each of us. So neat. Luke and Jonah did not stop talking the entire time. I was just so blessed to see our world through their eyes. We looked at the red berries with the deer prints nearby and talked about how the deer must like the berries. Then, just a few steps away, we found deer poop with the berry seeds in it. Such great boy science!

We did make it the whole 2 miles. When we got home, we cut brown paper sacks into pieces. We each got a piece of paper, wadded it up to make texture, and then "painted" with the berries. They had great fun talking about "God's paint" that He put in nature! Then, we glued all of the colorful leaves around the edges to make frames for our initials. So, we have 5 initial nature art pieces. Well, I guess they were more "craft" than art since we all make like pieces. After that, we made a tablescape with everything we brought in.

Fun day! God is good and this is reason #124 why we home school. We made a great memory today that they'll never forget!

A TV-free Life

Ok, so, it's been 24 days now (yes, I actually stopped to count it up!) since our family has watched TV. On Monday, June 21, we gave our last TV to our neighbors. It's not that we don't ever want a TV again. We just knew that moving here was going to begin a whole new way of life for our family. We also knew that we'd be busy, busy, busy getting the business going and not really have time to watch it. Also, the way our new living room is set up, a flat screen really is the only option. Well, I guess there are other options, but they would look pretty iffy. So, while we enjoy the peace and calmness that a TV-free household is, we are saving for a flat screen. Robby says we'll have a new one by the time football season starts. (My Dad breathed a great sigh of relief on that one!)
It has also been a good detox time for our in-house Wii professional. He has gotten to go to grandparents and get his "fix" a few times, so he's doing fine. We are listening to a lot more music, playing a lot more games, and reading a lot more books. It really is a good thing. (Oh, yeah...and saving a lot of money every month by not giving it to DirectTV!)
Why do we need to watch the junk on a screen when we have the beauty outside our back door???

Little Churches

One thing I love about driving through East Texas is all of the small churches you pass. You can't go very far down the road without passing a church and many of them have the marquis signs out front with messages. On the way to pick up our cousin today, I passed this inspiring message:
"Where God guides, He will provide."
So encouraging! I love when God speaks to me even in church signs on the road. I guess He could've put that up there for someone else who needed it to, but I claimed it as mine today. God has guided us here every step of the way and we know, without a doubt, that He will provide for our every need as we journey down the road.
Phiilipians 4:19 is one of my faves:
"My God will meet all of your needs according to His glorious riches in Christ Jesus." Our NEEDS---not our wants. I have to have that conversation so often with our boys. I am trying to teach them the difference between what we NEED vs. what we WANT. Yet, I still struggle with the same idea. I should be thankful that we have internet access right now, even if it moves at the speed of molasses! We could have none. I need to be thankful we have a back-up car to drive since my van seems to be dying a slow, painful death. These are all minor details that are "wants" in our lives and not needs. We have been blessed with everything we need, plus so much more than we could "ever ask or imagine".
God is good and we are blessed. He has guided us here and He will provide for us here.